Balancing Mom-Life, Work-Life, and More
*Please note that I am NOT a doctor, nor do I claim any of these facts to be "medical facts".*
What is a balanced life?
Having balance in your life is considering all aspects including relationships, work, fitness and health, and emotional well-being, and prioritizing your time to divide your attention and energy among those areas that are important to you. Finding balance in all areas is considered "living a balanced life".
Why is being a mom so stressful?
When your baby just WILL NOT go to bed, no matter what you try. You've got things to do. You know, laundry, shower, washing the dishes, or even just reading a book by yourself in a quiet corner. Instead, your baby is fighting bedtime, nothing is working. You're frustrated, your baby is frustrated, and the next thing you know, they puke ALL over you, themselves, the bed, the carpet. It's in their hair, down your bra, soaking into your socks, and all you can do now is cry with them.
You wake your 7-year-old up to get ready for school. They don't wake up. You come back two minutes later, they groan and moan, and pull the covers over their face. All the while, you are trying to get ready yourself so you look someone decent for the day. Five more minutes later, you turn the light on, steal their blanket, put their clothes in front of their face and leave to go get another kid ready or start breakfast. You go check on the 7-year-old and only their shirt is on, they're playing with toys, and so you remind them what time we have to leave, that if they don't eat breakfast they'll be hungry during class and demand that they put their pants on. Another 5 minutes later they FINALLY have their pants on, but they're hungry so they break for breakfast but eat at the speed of a snail. Finally, all the kids are ready, fed, and it's time to walk out the door, but now your 7-year-old can't find his mask/shoes/coat/etc. You finally locate the item, get everyone in the car and buckled, and now they're late for school.
These are only a couple of real-life stories from my own life. I'm sure moms everywhere have a million stories like this, but I think you get my point. Being a mom ain't easy!
How do you balance your life?
There are many ways an individual can find balance in their life. Those ways will also depend on the individual as everyone is different and requires different routines.
First and foremost, you must identify what your current routine in life is and then play around with a "schedule" that works best for you. Do NOT schedule every minute of your day. This will defeat the purpose of finding a balanced life. What you should do instead is make a general outline of the things you want to get done. For moms, life is unpredictable, do not pin yourself to a schedule, that will only create anxiety.
Why is a balanced lifestyle important?
Living a balanced lifestyle allows for more attention and devotion to the things that are most important to you! When you practice living a balanced lifestyle, especially as a mom, it creates a pocket of relief and lessens your stress level.
How can I focus on myself as a mom?
Self-care, self-care, self-care! There are infinite ways a mom can "treat herself", but I will list some of my top suggestions here.
Take a long hot shower
Rest your eyes in a quiet dark place
Go out for coffee with a friend
Get a massage, pedicure, facial, etc
Unplug from social media
Etc. Etc. Etc.
The trick to focusing on yourself as a mom is being open and honest with your needs. If you are married or have a significant other, talk to them! If you are a military/first responder spouse, or you are a single mom, still identify someone who can be your support buddy.
No matter what your situation is, it's important to find someone that you can confide in, talk to, voice your frustrations and woes too. We all need a #momfriend! Just know, I am willing to be that friend, my inboxes are always open! You can also join my Real Mom Insider's group to make even more mom friends!
How can I be the best mother and wife?
By prioritizing the things that make YOU happy. I know, I know, there is NO way you can put your needs before theirs, but hear me out! Picture yourself as a pitcher of water. Your husband and kids are the glasses. You have to first fill up the pitcher (aka, YOU) before you can pour water (your time, love, and attention) into the cups of your family.
Okay great, but how?
Well, ask yourself what makes you happy. Don't say things like, "watching my kids play together" or "taking care of my husband". While those things might be true, they are also bullshit in this scenario. I'm talking about the things that light you up inside.
Writing, painting, reading, taking a long shower, washing your face, doing makeup, photography, skateboarding, running, doing crafts, watching a good rom-com, building something, WHATEVER IT MAY BE!
After you've written down (and you should write them down) and figured out what you like to do, now, here is the secret... Are you ready?
Do. The. Things.
Prioritize some mommy-time and do something that makes you feel good inside. Please!